Hey. Have you ever had a burger? Yeah?
What about a burger in a train cart? Sure!
Okay. Have you ever had: a burger in a train cart... that sits on top of a roof?
... Maybe not?
Well, it's totally a thing over in Collingwood and JoJo and LiLi are here to tell you all about it!
Generally speaking, Mondays are generally pretty terrible.
There we were at the end of a long day, on Punt road, trying desperately not to fail at public transport so that we could make it to Collingwood in one piece. It had just started to rain and we looked like two drenched cats that had fallen into a pool, clambering onto that bus.
Then there was that moment where we thought we were lost, having found ourselves suddenly tottering through a residential area, thinking:
Burgs surely do not reside here.
Things would however pick up quite drastically when we spotted the infamous cable cars teetering off the edge of a building in the distance. And in the distance, we also made out the faint outline of Grumpy Mate Rich and Old Mate Tal out the front, waiting for us.
We were greeted by some warm, hospitable smiles which drew our attention away from the loud vibrancy of the graffiti on the bright yellow walls in the main dining area. The guys behind the counter took our names and then promptly lead us to the carts up stairs.
Something to note: we had to book to be able to dine in the train cart on the top floor. Easey's website also stated that we could only have our spot for an hour which is why we were quite eager to get there on time.
So, with no time to spare, we got straight to it.
Pictured above is a mason jar of prosecco - nice variety on their bar menu.
We were a little intimidated by some of the offerings on the menu - particularly the Melbourne Madness. The waiter politely explained that if we added fried chicken to it, that it became an "All the Way to Flinders" - an entirely different burger all together and quite the impressive offering by the sounds of things!
After much deliberation, here's what we ended up going with.
Changz Chicken Sanga ($14)
Too Ease ($14)
+ Mac N Cheese ($4)
Grumpy Mate Rich
+ x3 Beef Patty ($12)
+ x1 Bacon ($3)
+ Chip Dip (Garlic Aioli) ($1)
Old Mate Tal
Melbourne Madness ($23)
+ Chicken ($25)
Let's talk about LiLi's chicken sanga first.
Fried chicken with melted American cheddar, housing bacon, lettuce and mayo. Nuff said! Leave greasy at the door because this burger does not have a bar of it!
Surprisingly, the fried chicken is crisp and moist with not one hint of dryness. This rather straightforward burger delivers to meet all expectations! No runny, oily messes - just a clean burger that even healthy eaters should try. Kidding! The chicken is still deep fried.
It's a safer bet for those looking for a light-ish meal and doesn't weigh you down. Could do with some extra cheese though! Moooooooore cheeeeeeeese.
Jo's Too Ease was extra cheesy.
Not a bad burger overall, but it could've done with an extra patty which JoJo says she would have no issue with adding to it if she ever returned.
The five-cheese mac and cheese was a fantastic addition, pushing this burger over the expected norm, all the while making this quite the sloppy feed indeed.
Oh, I see how it is LiLi.
Just you wait. I will go out of my way to capture you in all your LiLi glory. High def. Mid-scarf
Just yooouuuuu wait.
Old Mate Tal must not have eaten very much that day.
He managed to get talked into the All the Way to Flinders and gosh, it certainly had it's own commanding presence on our table when it finally arrived.
All the Way to Flinders is a heaping tower of two beef patties, three layers of american cheddar, bacon, a potato cake, a dim sim, jalapeños, pickles, onions, a fried chicken, ketchup and mustard, encompassed in what we are told, is a potato bun. Lord.
Attractive in a monstrous sort of way, you couldn't help but think that the wait staff at Easey's probably got a kick out of the reaction on people's faces every time one of these was placed in front of their patrons.
It appeared to be a struggle to eat but Tal assured us that it went down without any issue and joked he could even do another.
You'd be forgiven if you thought this was some sort of lucky dog's gourmet dinner. Hunk of meat, stainless steal dish - the thought was definitely there when it was placed in front of Grumpy Mate Rich.
Grumpy Mate Rich is off carbohydrates again, so he elected for three patties and some bacon to conform to his high fat low carb lifestyle.
He said it was pretty good.
We'll have to take his word for it.
He did say however, that he was surprised at the fact that the aioli couldn't go on top of the patties - only on the side. He also added that without condiments, the patties were a little on the dry side but were otherwise good.
Walking from our Bus stop I thought to myself "what a cozy suburb". I haven't really walked around Collingwood to appreciate the vintage housing that is Melbourne. Then I wondered if a train cart burger joint would disrupt the pleasantness of the suburb. As we approached Easey's, it's oddly located between the major bar scene and housing - it's like it's own majestic wonderland.
Upon arrival the staff are super friendly and accommodating. I like the small bar located on the ground floor, it's a great hangout. After walking up 3 levels of stairs, we arrived into a transformed train cart burger diner. It was a fun setting and I felt like a kid inside, so easily pleased and excited to observe every inch of the train, looking out the window to the surrounding urban concrete jungle. The only downside, was that the aircon didn't really kick in on the hot day that we arrived, so I was quickly melting.
I had the pleasure of enjoying the Chicken Sanga. The American cheddar is what I'm all about. it's so much more satisfying than normal cheddar! The chicken wasn't too oily and cooked to juicy perfection. I honestly don't think it needs much more ingredients to what it already has. I like how simply put together this burger is and it can't really disappoint.
I recommend this place for a good catch up place with friends. Just a good novelty hangout for something different and an easy excuse to enjoy a burger because who doesn't love burgers?
I loved the sensory overload you experienced walking into Easey's. You take a good hit from the vibrant hues, the wide smiles from behind the counter, the checkered diner booths and the graffiti masking the walls like some pretty ace derelicte (re: Zoolander) style wallpaper.
Oh and of course, the distinct mouth watering scent of burg.
Too Ease is a great balanced burger for the uninitiated, although, I kind of wished I had added one extra patty. The mac and cheese was definitely a good decision and tied everything in quite nicely even if it was a little sloppier. That being said, you're at a diner enjoying a great burger - the only reason you should care about getting bits of burger everywhere is because it isn't going directly into your mouth.
I can be quite profound when I want to be. #preach
My only other regret was that I should have tried a little more on the menu. Perhaps on my next visit, time will be a little more forgiving and I will have the opportunity to try out a couple of sides, maybe a doughnut or two.
It's a quirky little hang out for people from all walks of life, with a quirky but pleasant environment reinforced by some pretty charming staff. Bring a date, a friend, your mum - I doubt you'd be disappointed.
Do keep in mind that bookings are essential for the top floor train carts, though!
Food and Drink: ★★★★☆
Customer Service: ★★★★☆
General Atmosphere: ★★★☆☆
Value for Money: ★★★☆☆
JO JO'S RATING
Food and Drink: ★★★★☆
Customer Service: ★★★★☆
General Atmosphere: ★★★☆☆
Value for Money: ★★★★☆
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